People Treat You How You Feel About Yourself: Ways to Change How You Feel About Yourself
Have you ever noticed that how others treat you often mirrors how you treat yourself? When you feel confident and secure in your own skin, the world tends to respond to you in a similar way. Conversely, when you’re insecure or self-critical, people may treat you in ways that reflect those feelings. The way you view yourself shapes your interactions with others, and how you feel about yourself directly impacts the respect, love, and kindness you receive from the people around you.
Many of us struggle with self-worth and self-love at different points in our lives. But the truth is, in order to experience the love and respect we deserve from others, we must first cultivate it within ourselves. This blog explores the concept that people treat you how you feel about yourself, and offers actionable ways to change how you feel about yourself, so you can attract more positive and loving relationships.
Understanding the Connection Between Self-Perception and How Others Treat You
The way we perceive ourselves creates an invisible energy that others pick up on. Think about it: When you walk into a room feeling confident and self-assured, you likely exude a certain magnetism. People are naturally drawn to those who are comfortable in their own skin, and they tend to treat them with the same respect and positivity that they radiate.
On the other hand, when you feel insecure or down on yourself, it’s often reflected in your body language, tone of voice, and interactions with others. People may pick up on these negative vibes, leading them to treat you in ways that mirror those insecurities—whether it’s dismissive, distant, or even critical behavior. The energy you put out into the world is often the energy you receive in return.
This doesn’t mean that you have no control over how others treat you. In fact, by changing the way you feel about yourself, you can shift the way others perceive and interact with you. By fostering self-love, respect, and confidence, you invite others to treat you in a way that aligns with these positive feelings. So, how do you change how you feel about yourself? Here are a few key steps to get started.
1. Practice Self-Compassion
The first step to changing how you feel about yourself is to treat yourself with kindness and compassion. Self-compassion means being gentle with yourself during times of failure or difficulty, rather than being overly critical or judgmental. It’s about recognizing that you are human, and like everyone else, you are allowed to make mistakes, learn, and grow.
When you practice self-compassion, you stop punishing yourself for not being perfect. Instead, you treat yourself as you would treat a friend who is going through a tough time—offering understanding, patience, and encouragement. This shift in mindset can have a profound impact on how you feel about yourself and how you show up in the world.
Actionable Steps:
- Replace negative self-talk with affirmations and kind words.
- Forgive yourself for past mistakes and acknowledge the lessons you’ve learned.
- Be patient with your growth and remind yourself that progress takes time.
2. Build Your Self-Esteem Through Achievements
Low self-esteem often stems from a lack of belief in your own abilities. One way to boost your confidence is by setting and achieving small, realistic goals. Each success, no matter how minor, helps build a foundation of self-worth. As you prove to yourself that you are capable, your perception of yourself begins to shift, and you’ll naturally feel more deserving of respect and love from others.
Achieving goals gives you a sense of accomplishment, which translates into a positive self-image. It reminds you that you are competent, capable, and worthy of success. This newfound confidence in your abilities will be evident in how you carry yourself and how others respond to you.
Actionable Steps:
- Set daily or weekly goals that challenge you to step out of your comfort zone.
- Celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how small, to reinforce a positive self-image.
- Focus on progress, not perfection—acknowledge the steps you’re taking toward your goals.
3. Let Go of Negative Comparisons
Comparing yourself to others is one of the quickest ways to damage your self-esteem. With social media constantly presenting curated images of “success,” “beauty,” and “happiness,” it’s easy to fall into the trap of feeling inadequate. But comparison only steals your joy and distorts your sense of self-worth.
Remember that everyone has their own journey, and what you see on the outside isn’t always the full story. Instead of comparing yourself to others, focus on your own unique qualities, strengths, and experiences. When you stop measuring your worth based on others, you begin to appreciate and love yourself for who you truly are.
Actionable Steps:
- Limit your time on social media to reduce the temptation to compare.
- Unfollow accounts that trigger feelings of inadequacy or jealousy.
- Practice gratitude by regularly reflecting on what makes you unique and special.
4. Prioritize Self-Care
Taking care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally is a powerful way to improve how you feel about yourself. Self-care is an act of self-love that tells you that you are worthy of time, attention, and care. When you prioritize self-care, you are sending a message to yourself that your well-being matters.
Self-care isn’t just about pampering yourself with facials or massages (though those are nice too!). It’s about taking time to nourish your body with healthy food, exercise, rest, and mental relaxation. It’s about setting boundaries and learning to say no to things that drain your energy. By consistently caring for yourself, you reinforce the belief that you deserve to feel good and be treated well.
Actionable Steps:
- Create a self-care routine that includes physical, emotional, and mental care.
- Schedule “me time” regularly, whether it’s for a hobby, relaxation, or spending time in nature.
- Set boundaries with people or situations that drain your energy or make you feel bad about yourself.
5. Surround Yourself With Positive People
The people you spend time with have a significant influence on how you feel about yourself. If you surround yourself with individuals who uplift you, encourage your growth, and appreciate you for who you are, you will naturally begin to feel more confident and secure in your own worth. On the other hand, if you’re surrounded by negative or toxic people who belittle you or make you feel small, it can be challenging to maintain a positive self-image.
Choosing to spend time with people who value and respect you is essential for your emotional well-being. Positive relationships reinforce your sense of self-worth and help you develop a more loving relationship with yourself.
Actionable Steps:
- Evaluate the relationships in your life and make adjustments as needed.
- Spend more time with people who lift you up and inspire you.
- Set boundaries with those who consistently bring negativity into your life.
6. Practice Gratitude
Gratitude is one of the simplest and most powerful ways to improve your self-image. When you regularly acknowledge the positive aspects of your life, you shift your focus from what’s lacking to what you have. Gratitude helps you appreciate your strengths, your achievements, and the unique qualities that make you who you are.
Practicing gratitude allows you to see yourself in a more positive light, fostering a sense of security and self-love. It also helps you develop a mindset of abundance, rather than scarcity, which is essential for attracting positive treatment from others.
Actionable Steps:
- Start a gratitude journal where you write down things you are grateful for each day.
- Focus on the qualities you appreciate about yourself and the ways you’ve grown.
- Practice being thankful for the love and support you receive from others.
7. Embrace Vulnerability
Vulnerability is often seen as a weakness, but in reality, it’s a powerful tool for building true self-acceptance. When you allow yourself to be vulnerable, you show others that you are human, imperfect, and authentic. This openness fosters deeper connections and invites others to treat you with kindness and respect.
By embracing vulnerability, you give yourself permission to be your true self without the need for perfection or approval. This, in turn, leads to stronger and more meaningful relationships.
Actionable Steps:
- Share your feelings and experiences with people you trust.
- Let go of the need to hide your flaws or weaknesses from others.
- Be authentic in your interactions, allowing others to see the real you.
Conclusion: Changing How You Feel About Yourself
The way others treat you is a reflection of how you treat yourself. By practicing self-compassion, setting boundaries, prioritizing self-care, and letting go of negative comparisons, you can shift your perception of yourself and invite more love, respect, and kindness into your life. Remember, self-love is not a destination; it’s a lifelong practice. As you work on changing how you feel about yourself, you will see that the way others treat you will begin to mirror your newfound self-assurance.
You deserve to be treated with love, respect, and kindness, and it all starts with how you view yourself. The more you nurture a positive self-image, the more you will attract people who value and appreciate you for who you truly are. So, take the first step today: Start loving yourself, and watch as the world reflects that love back to you.